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[ website | mike dot darkillustrated dot org ]
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MYSTERY BOX!!! [Mar. 15th, 2007|11:46 am]




PLEASE, people, don't all start bidding at once!! Form an orderly queue.

I love the Item Location too. I wonder if that's where Encyclopedia Brown lives.

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"Home", for the holidays. [Dec. 23rd, 2006|12:03 pm]

a 10-minute film by Mike Wood.

Have a safe and happy holiday, everyone.

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(no subject) [Dec. 22nd, 2006|09:43 am]

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(no subject) [Nov. 2nd, 2006|11:14 am]

Hween 2006 (theme - hasbeens)Collapse )
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digitally versatile, BROTHER! [Oct. 19th, 2006|11:05 am]

THE BEST dvd purchase of the week, IF NOT EVER.

Anyone who knows me well knows that i hate DVDs and would never ever bring one into my home. THIS, though, was an exception; I'd been waiting for a collection like this featuring all of Hogan's classic matches for years now to alongside those old battered VHS copies of Mr. Nanny and Santa With Muscles. I have such fond memories of the Hulkster's title match versus the Ultimate Anthology at wrestlemania VI, and fortunately, not only has that famous match clearly influenced this boxset's title, but is also included here to preserve digitally for future generations to enjoy every Christmas.

And now, a trip down memory lane --

Hulk Hogan endorses Cheerios
Part of a balanced breakfast, brother.

Hulk Hogan smack-talks some Gremlins
Man, Gremlins 2. I remember seeing that thing 3 or 4 times in theatres whatever summer it came out in. Midway through the movie, during a random conversation between two characters, the film sputters and rips as if there's been a projector malfunction. Two sillhouettes of Gremlins then appear on the blank white screen doing shadowpuppets as if in the projection booth; they then start playing random stock-footage clips, and then this little interlude played with the theatre manager getting the Hulkster to sort the problem out. The whole scene would've made no sense on video, so they replaced that segment with one appearing as if your VCR was messing up, and then John Wayne saves the day instead. The film's novelization did something different entirely, with just a 2-page interjection by the "Brain" Gremlin, claiming he'd captured the writer and had temporarily hijacked the book, apologizing in the process for the lack of Hulk Hogan in this novel version, as that scene only appears in the movie. What impressive cross-format self-referential mindblowingness for 1990!!!

Hulk Hogan's a REAL AMERICAN
The Hulkster starring in Rick Derringer's music video for "Real American". There are no words.

Hulk Hogan's own movie
No Holds Barred. Wow. Makes a good triple-bill alongside D.C. Cab and Secret Of The Ooze. Welcome to my sunday afternoons in 1991.

A POEM, by Hulk Hogan
I always loved that Hulk needed such a MASSIVE book for such a stupidly short poem. There can't even possibly be OTHER poems from his ouvre in that book, as the title's "A" clearly implies only one. What are we, STUPID?!?!?!?

Hulk Hogan emcee's POKEMON DAY
"THE tenth-anniversary-party OF THE DECADE!!!"
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Yarrr!!! [Sep. 21st, 2006|11:48 am]
September 21st; the official end of the summer, and end to all the spelunking, jazz, avoiding livejournal, european travel and other hobbies enjoyed during those long warm summer nights.

And what better way to wind down the summer than with a trip to...

PIRATES!!! also: festival.Collapse )
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i liiike!!! [Sep. 8th, 2006|02:50 am]

Just came back from the attempted World Premiere of the new BORAT movie which was scheduled to start at midnight thursday on opening night of the 2006 Toronto International Film Festival.

It started just fine, but then the projector broke about 10 minutes into the movie. After being told to expect repeated 5 minute delays after 5 minute delays, everyone in the upper balcony where i was started muttering and pointing towards the projection booth, where a recognizably obese MICHAEL MOORE was frantically trying to fix it. Moore eventually came out onstage to explain that he used to do this for a living and knew that there was some new part the projector needed, and our theatre had sent someone to the nearby Elgin to try and borrow that part from their projector. Moore and the film's director Larry Charles then hung around onstage for about 20minutes to answer questions, "on any subject at all, really", which included a few political barbs before 20minutes dragged on and there apparently wasn't much else to ask but "WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE CHEERS EPISODE?" and "WHAT'D YOU THINK OF TOM CRUISE'S BABY PHOTO?".

Borat himself eventually came back out onstage, very embarassed about the holdup, answering more questions until we were all told that the projector couldn't be salvaged and the screening had to be rescheduled for the Elgin Theatre at midnight this Friday the 8th (which is a much larger venue and likely means there'd be more lastminute tickets available for those who couldn't get 'em before the Ryerson Theatre showing sold-out).

And yes, there are apparently creepy zombie fanboys for anyone remotely famous.

[UPDATE] - sonjaaa, sister of Thai action superstar Tony Jaaa, is graciously hosting some audio files of the pre-movie intro and post-accident Q&A!

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a cellular peptide cake (with mint frosting) [Aug. 17th, 2006|10:25 am]

OMG, best birthday cake ever!!

and much less depressing than the "dying of AIDS"-themed cake someone gave me last year

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oh HELL no [Jul. 27th, 2006|08:20 am]

Assorted FRAKES ON A PLANE swag, now available for a limited time @


GRAPE APE tees also available from the Stag Nation store; conveniently pre-weathered for that hip vintage look all the kids love! A Pendergast classic.


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THIS WEEKEND [Jun. 22nd, 2006|07:40 pm]

Thing #1:
NO-LONGER-INFINITE KUNG FU!!! (or: "Bulletproof Funk")

After over a decade of just-under-the-radar hipsterism in the thriving Toronto indie film scene, KUNG FU FRIDAYS will roll its final reel with this Friday June 23rd's screening of THE CRIPPLED AVENGERS. Cripples may have been responsible for closing Toronto's historic Uptown Theatre three years ago, but now should provide a great final sendoff to the even-older Revue theatre on Roncesvalles as we laugh and laugh and laugh at their various degrees of deformity and cripplosity.

Programmer Colin Geddes had this to say on the KFF website:

Disciples, I bear sad, sad news...

It looks like Kung Fu Fridays has come to an end. Not due to a jinx palm blast delivered to my vital solar stance power point, but due to the closing of a cinema. As many of you might have noticed, there has been a "For Sale" sign posted at our former temple, The Royal. Sad news there, but it gets worse. The Revue Cinema is going to close its doors on June 30th as will the Royal, The Kingsway and The Paradise. Afraid I don't have the answers for you and I am a little baffled at the decision, but I do know it means that the Kung Fu Fridays series now has no home. Not to sure what will happen with the series, but in the mean time I will have to go on a trek to a mountain top and ask for advice from my sifu on the future of KFF. Maybe a new temple will be found or built? Maybe the series will change, grow and become a new ferocious cinema experience. Who knows. At this point I certianly hold the golden answer. But the thing is not to be sad. Hold your head high if you have ever attended a screening. We will not be defeated and we will not go without a roar! Scroll down to read about THE VERY LAST KUNG FU FRIDAYS SHOW. So tell your friends about the last screenings. Thank you all for your loyal patronage over the years.

In this week's Sunday Star, there was a very respectful story on the passing of Kung Fu Fridays. Read it here.

And if you are upset by the closing of The Revue, make your voice heard by signing the online petition and learn out to get active in saving The Revue here.

Director: Chang Cheh
Cast: Chen Kuan-tai, Lu Feng, Phillip Kwok, Johnny Wang Lung Wei,
Lo Meng, Chiang Sheng, Sun Chien, Dick Wei, Jamie Luk Kim Ming, Cheng Miu, Poon Bing Seung, Chui Tai Ping
Hong Kong / Dubbed in English / 1978 / 90 minutes / 14A
June 23 – 9:45pm
The Revue theatre - 400 Roncesvalles Ave.

(3 blocks south of Dundas West subway station)

Thing #2:
ISLANDS IN THE SUN (or: "I do believe in ferries; I do; I do.")

An afternoon of CHEAP social-fun on the Toronto Islands, playing frisbee, riding the Log Flume, and such, while basking for free in the not-paid-for sounds of the easily hearable Olympic Island music fest happening nearby.

Afterwards: RAGING KEGGER that same night at a currently-undisclosable location of which anyone coming along will be privy.

Anyone who wants to come along: meet my group in that little outdoors path between both Union Stations (the bit where you go outside for a second to get from the TTC station to the GO station or vice versa) at 1pm Saturday afternoon before we walk to the ferry dock!

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